It's Not Easy Being Sick
Okay, it's official. I'm tired of being sick, and I'm sick of being tired. I appear to have a mild flu (and by mild I mean I can stand up, drive if I have to, and have no apparent desire to die, all of which did not happen in the Great Flu Episode of 1991, in which I seriously could not sit up in bed at all), which every time I think it's going away, comes back. So I'm in that kind of bored but sick place where I'm stir crazy, but don't feel like doing anything actually interesting, like reading a real book, or opening Sullivan's Travels (although that one is that I'm too weak to pull open the stupid cellophane). I'm getting through that stack of Gourmet magazines -- I subscribed once, probably back in 1999, and they've been coming ever since. Every once in a while they threaten "This is the last one!" but they're still coming. If I ever feel like eating again, there was a good looking omelette that I want to make one of these days.
Some things that I've noticed while parked in front of the tv:
1) eHarmony must be stopped. I think it's like the Moonies -- a cult that feeds you the happy juice and empties your pockets -- they certainly seem to have this HUGE advertising revenue stream so they can blanket EVERY channel AT THE SAME TIME. And while I'm really happy that all those people found each other, and I'm even willing to suspend disbelief and accept all those testimonials as real, I still haven't seen a guy on there that floats my boat, and the women are kind of...average too. Now, while I am certainly average myself, part of what I'd be paying for is the fantasy, not the promise of another schnook like me. And I also thought about those few people that I have felt a serious connection to in the past and asked myself "would they sign up here", and I had to honestly say no. Not that they would consider themselves above it or anything like that, but it's just not their nature. So while my perfect match may be out there, it's not going to be on that website at $50 a month or whatever it is. So shut up already and get off my teevee.
2) I understand that the cable channels don't have all that much programming, but the programming rule of "run the 8-11pm programming a second time to get the West Coast" is really annoying if you don't sleep and are up until at least 2 am anyway. I found myself saying things like "you know, that wall color was bad at 9 pm, and seeing it at 1 am isn't helping things at all."
3) HGTV and Fine Living have been taken over by Canadians. They're very careful not to say where they are, but half the shows are being run by hosts who say "aboot" and talk about "the North Amercian market". True shows made in the US of A never remember we have a neighbor to the north, and only remember about our neighbor to the south when it's a spring break travel show, or it's a right wing channel blathering on about immigration policy. I know about those guys. I've seen South Park. I've got my eyes on you.
Have I mentioned that I'm cranky, too?
One cool thing I did notice, though. Riddle me this folks. Even though I am sick, I can't actually sit still, so the crumbs in front of the couch (one of the three surfaces I move between to prevent insanity -- couch, bed, and this chair I'm in now) were bugging me. Now I had noticed that when I vacuum normally, the tv goes all wonky -- there's interference. I had always assumed that that was because the vacuum cleaner drew too much power from the socket, and caused the TV to lose some power. However, today, I pulled out the cordless vac, and instead of using the little nozzle, I used the mini rug attachment with a rotating brush. When I turned it on -- there was interference on the tv. Off -- nothing. On, off, on, off, on, off. (Okay, I'm easily amused with a fever). I switched back to the other attachment and nothing -- picture as sharp as a tack. So what's the connection between the rotating brush (which is what my regular vacuum has) and TV interference? There's no hidden antenna in there communicating with the base station (or Mars, or the Russians), so what's up with that?
Okay, back to the couch. I think there may be a home makeover show on somewhere.
Okay, it's official. I'm tired of being sick, and I'm sick of being tired. I appear to have a mild flu (and by mild I mean I can stand up, drive if I have to, and have no apparent desire to die, all of which did not happen in the Great Flu Episode of 1991, in which I seriously could not sit up in bed at all), which every time I think it's going away, comes back. So I'm in that kind of bored but sick place where I'm stir crazy, but don't feel like doing anything actually interesting, like reading a real book, or opening Sullivan's Travels (although that one is that I'm too weak to pull open the stupid cellophane). I'm getting through that stack of Gourmet magazines -- I subscribed once, probably back in 1999, and they've been coming ever since. Every once in a while they threaten "This is the last one!" but they're still coming. If I ever feel like eating again, there was a good looking omelette that I want to make one of these days.
Some things that I've noticed while parked in front of the tv:
1) eHarmony must be stopped. I think it's like the Moonies -- a cult that feeds you the happy juice and empties your pockets -- they certainly seem to have this HUGE advertising revenue stream so they can blanket EVERY channel AT THE SAME TIME. And while I'm really happy that all those people found each other, and I'm even willing to suspend disbelief and accept all those testimonials as real, I still haven't seen a guy on there that floats my boat, and the women are kind of...average too. Now, while I am certainly average myself, part of what I'd be paying for is the fantasy, not the promise of another schnook like me. And I also thought about those few people that I have felt a serious connection to in the past and asked myself "would they sign up here", and I had to honestly say no. Not that they would consider themselves above it or anything like that, but it's just not their nature. So while my perfect match may be out there, it's not going to be on that website at $50 a month or whatever it is. So shut up already and get off my teevee.
2) I understand that the cable channels don't have all that much programming, but the programming rule of "run the 8-11pm programming a second time to get the West Coast" is really annoying if you don't sleep and are up until at least 2 am anyway. I found myself saying things like "you know, that wall color was bad at 9 pm, and seeing it at 1 am isn't helping things at all."
3) HGTV and Fine Living have been taken over by Canadians. They're very careful not to say where they are, but half the shows are being run by hosts who say "aboot" and talk about "the North Amercian market". True shows made in the US of A never remember we have a neighbor to the north, and only remember about our neighbor to the south when it's a spring break travel show, or it's a right wing channel blathering on about immigration policy. I know about those guys. I've seen South Park. I've got my eyes on you.
Have I mentioned that I'm cranky, too?
One cool thing I did notice, though. Riddle me this folks. Even though I am sick, I can't actually sit still, so the crumbs in front of the couch (one of the three surfaces I move between to prevent insanity -- couch, bed, and this chair I'm in now) were bugging me. Now I had noticed that when I vacuum normally, the tv goes all wonky -- there's interference. I had always assumed that that was because the vacuum cleaner drew too much power from the socket, and caused the TV to lose some power. However, today, I pulled out the cordless vac, and instead of using the little nozzle, I used the mini rug attachment with a rotating brush. When I turned it on -- there was interference on the tv. Off -- nothing. On, off, on, off, on, off. (Okay, I'm easily amused with a fever). I switched back to the other attachment and nothing -- picture as sharp as a tack. So what's the connection between the rotating brush (which is what my regular vacuum has) and TV interference? There's no hidden antenna in there communicating with the base station (or Mars, or the Russians), so what's up with that?
Okay, back to the couch. I think there may be a home makeover show on somewhere.
posted by Lily @ Saturday, April 01, 2006
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