Okay already! It's been a busy couple of weeks, although it being May had nothing to do with it, Betster. It was more like being Dorothy adrift in Kansas.

To break the blogging drought, I shall gracefully accept my tag from Flipsycab and answer the following:

If I could be a scientist...I'd finally work out that missing bit to the Grand Unified Field Theory. Those equations can't be that close for no reason at all.
If I could be a farmer...I'd have lots of cute farmhands to muck out the stables.
If I could be a musician...I'd probably be the drummer.
If I could be a doctor...I'd be okay at it. But all those sick people...
If I could be a painter...I'd use lots of colors.
If I could be a gardener...I'd go back to England and grow a kickass flower garden. My last garden was brick red and cream, so maybe I'll do a more varied rock garden with floral accents.
If I could be a missionary...I’d mind my own damn business.
If I could be a chef...I'd cook you a nice healthy dinner with fresh ingredients. It's just not that hard.
If I could be an architect...I'd concentrate on the interior design.
If I could be a linguist...I'd go back and finish my work on deriving the bogus but great fun Proto-Indo-European.
If I could be a psychologist...I’d be awful. 'Snap out of it already! You think anyone's really happy? What contract did you sign?"
If I could be a librarian...I’d be happy. I love libraries, especially big ones.
If I could be an athlete...I'd win a gold medal, because I'd like to be on that dais just once.
If I could be a lawyer...I'd do legal research. I like the investigation, not the fight.
If I could be an innkeeper...I'd have lots of hired help. I'm not doing morning breakfast duty.
If I could be a professor...you'll all be learning a lot of medieval history.
If I could be a writer...I'd be a travel or food writer.
If I could be a llama-rider...that would be sooooo cool.